A relative of mine passed away few days back in India. He was only in his early fifties. He leaves behind his wife, 22 year old son and a 19 year old girl. Couple of months back, he was diagnosed with advanced stage of kidney disease. His options were severely limited since he also had diabetics among other things. He simply hid all his conditions until couple of months back when he collapsed and forcibly taken to hospital.
He himself had lost both of his parents when he was only 14. Being the eldest of his family, he immediately took the responsibility and cared for his younger siblings, one brother and two sisters. He was successful in bringing them up and settling them well. I have great admiration for him and what he was able to achieve starting at such a tender age with only primary education.
He got related to us by marriage. I vividly remember his marriage; I must have been 11 then. He got married to one of my cousins and his sister to another of my cousin on the same day.
He had been an Ayyappa Bhaktan all his life. He had been going to Sabarimala every year for more than 20 years.
Their son, same age as my youngest brother, practically grew up at our home for several years. He stayed at our home for six years when he was going to high school in our town; he is like an adopted son of our family.
Like a lot of Indian men with little to no awareness of their own health, this relative hardly ever went to a doctor. Going for a regular checkup is out of question; going to the doctor even when you are sick, is also a very low priority. In their mind, they have better use for that money and they think their body is invincible. They simply go to a local pharmacy, tell them what ever they think their condition is, and get some pain killer or other and eat it. Sometimes, they use a prescription that was written years back! The combination of poverty and lack of awareness is such deadly.
Every time I go to India, when I come across such a person, I take the effort to explain the need for a physical checkup at least once every two years. Quality hospitals offer those for Rs 2000 to 3000. Most of the time, they do identify diseases in the beginning stages which makes it much easier to cure. We get our mom checked up once a year. I am forcing my brothers to do physical and eye exams and dental visits regularly. In fact, I am telling my poorer relatives that I will be happy to sponsor such checkups. The minimum we can do, when we visit India and see relatives is to bring awareness and remind them to do a physical checkup. This relative simply hid his condition from me; I wish I had known earlier.
Once we learned this relative’s poor health, I took care of his medical expenses and willing to spend all that was needed. But it was too late. He passed away peacefully in his sleep last Saturday. I pray for his soul to rest in peace. And let God give strength to those young kids to cope with this tragedy.
posted by Shan R Shanmuganathan at 10:44 PM
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That's a very powerful post, I am glad I had the opportunity to read it and experience it.
Shan,
The post is so true, I've been born and brought up in chennai, but my dad hails from a village down south... Its the same... Wish something happens to all these people, hope our country grows rich so all these people could be taken care of!!!
Trust me, we are working on it...
ஷான், ஒரு வாசகம் சொன்னாலும் திருவாசகமா சொன்னீங்க.
Part of the problem is the people's attitude .
"நம்ம உடம்புக்கு என்னடா வர போகுது"
இது என் அப்பா.
"வந்தா பாத்துக்கலாம்டா" இது என் அம்மா.
உடம்புக்கு ரொம்ப முடியாதவரை சீரியஸ் தெரியரதில்லை.
Hopefully the trend will change and indian men and women will pay little more attention to what their body tells them.
Also nice to see a wonderful blog from fellow charlottean.
Thanks for the comments Jay and Ramesh. Certainly it is a matter of attitude and awareness. We should try our best to make them aware.
Regards.